I’m mostly writing this post because I have been neglecting my little space of the internet and I don’t feel very good about it. I still have so many ideas, and things I’d like to write about but by the time I am finished with work, I just want to take a nap. Pregnancy has really gotten the best of me these last few weeks. I adjusted my full-time work schedule and am now leaving the office earlier. I’ve replaced those lost work hours with more time spent resting on my couch. Sometimes, I hobble to my bed.
But, anyhow- we made it. It’s September! Meaning October is just around the corner! I’ve never been one of those people who are really into any one season. I believe each season has their unique blessings. But this year, I am so in love with Fall. So, so, in love! Mainly because my baby girl is arriving in just a few short weeks. I am almost 33 weeks pregnant (measuring 34). I thought that I should start writing weekly bumpdates. Not only for my family, friends, and readers who might be interested. But for me and my daughter.
In the future, she can read about how she made me get up 5 times a night to go pee. How her tiny kicks were first felt by her Grandma this week. How she’s measuring a week ahead, and how thankful I am for the three donuts I had yesterday for breakfast. I’m realizing now that this journey is coming to an end. I’m finally at a point where I just want to soak it all in and I don’t want to forget a thing!
So where to begin? Let’s start with my favorites!
Okay, now what?
Let’s get physical… physical *Olivia Newton-John Tune*.
Physically, I feel huge. There is absolutely no mistaking my pregnant condition for a food baby. Currently, I am weighing in at 178 lbs. My midwife projects that I’ll gain about a pound a week until She arrives. Which will put me at about 183 lbs. before we’re all said and done. And I’m okay with that- I was thinking I’d be capping out at 200 lbs. and ready for my career as a sumo wrestler.
I sure do walk slower these days. Stairs are such an inconvenience. I have such bad SPD (Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction) which makes it really painful to move my legs in a step-like motion. It feels like there is a muscle tearing underneath my belly. I’ve been told this is completely normal and that it probably won’t subside until after I give birth. Ah, the joys of pregnancy!
Recently, my sleep has been greatly affected. I was fortunate for the first 25 weeks and I didn’t have any issues. Now, I’m waking up 5x a night to either use the restroom, stretch out my cramping legs, or re-adjust my position. I can only sleep on my side. As a stomach sleeper, this is just so annoying. My legs cramp up every night, in two different places. I have to be strategic about how I venture out of bed (again, its hard to do a leg-swinging motion). It involves a conscious effort. I’m always asking myself “how can I get out of this bed/roll over with the least amount of resistance?”
I haven’t experienced any Braxton-Hicks contractions… yet. My dad’s girlfriend’s daughter, Kayla, gave me the best description of what to expect. I will share below.
“Contractions are a little different for everyone, some get “back labor” or feel them low in the pelvis first… but you’ll know when they start. It’ll be something like you never felt before. Even having gone through labor before, whenever I get cramps or sharp pains I wonder “is this it?” I’m 36 weeks (and I had Pais at 38).
From what I remember, Contractions kinda start out like deep inside intense period cramps. They start out mild and short, will stop and give you some relief, then they will start back up and to get more intense and longer in duration. (If you can walk off the cramps or move around and they stop they are just cramps/ baby moving or Braxton Hicks).” – Kayla B.
Sometimes, I think I might be having contractions but then I realize that I just have to pass gas (lol) or use the bathroom (gross!). Super embarrassing, but it is what it is.
(Baby girl: One time, I was full on cradling the bathroom floor in a labor-ready position screaming for your dad. I said ‘this is it. get the car ready! I’m going into labor.” And, turns out… I just had a really bad stomach ache. Your dad laughed it off and said ‘Woman, you are in for a rude awakening when it really does happen.” Your mother is drama queen, through and through).
I started leaking colostrum this week. I got home from work and my bra was damp. I thought ‘Man, girlfriend- you must’ve been reallys weating today!” Not quite. A quick Google search informed me that my breasts are leaking Colostrum. Which is the first secretion from the mammary glands. It’s very rich in nutrients and antibodies. It’s also called “liquid gold”. It felt totally sci-fi. Which is kind of funny. The growing belly, changing nipples, etc. didn’t feel out of this world. But the leaking breasts- yep, I’m an alien!
Hmm, what else? Well, my nipples have changed color and size. Totally not cool, but apparently it helps the baby’s new peepers see their target when going in for the kill. Here’s hoping they go back to normal after I’m finished breastfeeding.
Energy is at an all time low. I was feeling pretty good for a while but now I’m noticing I really need to slow down. And take naps more often. I get short of breathe very easily and am usually fighting to keep my eyes open by 9:30 p.m.
Yesterday, I cried during the ‘Bachelor in Paradise’ Finale- if that’s any indication of my emotional instability. I’ve been very hush-hush about the emotional impact of this pregnancy. Personally, it hasn’t felt joyous, pleasant, or fun. I’ve had so many issues come up with friends, family, work, and everything in between. Mostly, I was stressed about what work was going to look like after the baby. I felt so much pressure to not let anyone down, including this little girl. I felt like this pregnancy was putting everyone in a big imposition. I’ve slowly realized that all of this was created in my head. I was making things out to be worse than they are, and I was doing a really great job at creating a false future for myself.
I realize now that I’m not in this alone in any of this. I have so many people supporting me. I talked to my good friend/supervisor and we came up with a tentative plan. Ever since we talked, I’ve felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders. Now, I am actually excited!
I plan on taking 12 weeks (at most) off from work . I’m fortunate to have the option to come back earlier-if I’m going stir crazy at home. I won’t be returning to my full-time position. I will be working part-time, about 20 hours a week. It will include working from home and some days in the office. I think this balance of working from home, while still getting out of the house is going to beneficial for me and the baby.
Either I haven’t thought about it or I haven’t stressed about how I am going to care for Her. I think that’s just going to come naturally. And, there’s also Youtube. I can watch videos about how to change diapers, burp, feed, put down for a nap, etc..
Most of my fears come from the thought of going into labor. I have zero tolerance for pain. I’m talking- I stub my toe and whine for days. I’m going to get an epidural, no questions asked. I’m going to do whatever it takes to get through the labor with experiencing as little pain as possible.
Okay, well that’s all I have for now. I’ll try keep my little blog updated on the all the new happenings of my pregnancy as the D-Day draws closer! Including my birth plan, a baby shower post, and an update on some of my favorite gifts from the shower.