thoughts: embrace change gracefully

Jessica DeBano

Sometimes, changes can happen without you even noticing. Read on to see how to handle it with grace.

Aww, Friday! Here we are again. Did it seem like this week blew by? Or did it seem to drag? Anybody experience any BIG or little changes? I feel like July is chalk-full of change. Summer months are go, go, go and I never get enough time to stop and reflect (a.ka. rest and recharge). This can make me anxious. Am I making positive or negative changes to my life? Am I reacting to things or am I responding gracefully?

Maybe sports started for your kids and your hustling them to-and-fro practices/games. Maybe you’re busy at work and forgetting to practice self-care. Personally, I’ve gone through so many changes this month and I thought it would be great to start a discussion on how we can embrace change gracefully.

Recent Changes:

  • BIG: My baby bump has completely popped. This resulted in changes to just about everything (sleep positions, clothes/style, self esteem, etc.)
  • BIG: Relationships between friends and family have had some changes. My dad moved to California.
  • BIG: I’m realizing the baby will be here in OCT. It’s ALMOST August.
  • SMALL: My step-son’s football season started so my routine has been completely altered. With it, went anything resembling a nutritional dinner. I’ve been eating gas station beef jerky and powder donuts.
  • SMALL: Prenatals made my hair grow like a weed. It was outgrown, and lost it’s color. I had to go back to the dark-side and lost 4 inches (See change can be beautiful).

So, how can we embrace the ebbs and flows of life, without completely losing sleep, binge-eating powder donuts (me), or pulling our hair out?


Accept The Present Moment.

“Whatever the present moment contains- accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it.”- Eckhart Tolle

Realize that life is journey and will be full of change. What exists now, may not be the same thing 10 days from now, or even 10 months from now.  Change is always an opportunity for us to expand– even if it is, sometimes painful. We owe it to ourselves and the people around us to use ‘change’ as a vessel to grow and refine ourselves.

Tip: Challenge yourself to accept the present moment for what it is. Try not to influence or forcefully alter situations in an attempt to make it what you think it ought to be. Try to enjoy the struggle and chaos because it is usually short-lived. And what’s on the other side is- you, but a stronger more-equipped version of you.


Focus Your Energy.

“The secret to change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” – Socrates

I’ll be honest, this last month wasn’t easy. There was a lot negative change. Arguments with friends, and things with family. Naturally, I wanted to engage. Instead, I used this time to focus my energy on others aspects of my life. I worked on creating new content for OliveandSmith.com, I fostered new relationships with friends, and started reading again.

Tip: Negative change doesn’t have to mean a negative outcome. Everyday, we have the freedom and choice to choose our thoughts and what we want to focus our energy on. Use negative changes to push you in a better direction. It will leave you empowered, and more aligned with who you truly are.


Own Who You Are.

“The greatest act of courage is to be & own all that you are. Without apology. Without excuses & without any masks.”

Intention is everything. And it’s going to look different on everybody. Do what resonates with you. If you are a person who likes to make small tweaks, do that. If you prefer to hit the ground running, do that. There is no wrong way to embrace change. Except, maybe resistance. Resisting  is what makes change painful.

Tip: Owning who you are means listening to your inner voice, and trusting your instincts. What is your heart telling you? My inner self told me to step back. From everything that was no longer serving me. And I’ll be honest, I’m better because of it. Yes, it was it was scary, but it made me free. It freed up the space in my heart to better love myself and the people around me.


Who says we have to have it all figured out.

“You don’t need to have it all figured out to move forward.”

Do your best. Change is NOT easy. And some people struggle more than others. We are all different and handle things in our own way. I hope this post can help others create positive responses to life’s changes- even when it feels like we’re on a roller coaster with no end in sight.

Tip: Relax knowing whatever is changing- will ultimately, work itself out. Don’t be afraid of new beginnings, from new people, new energy, new surroundings, new challenges. Always embraces new chances at happiness. If all else fails, go to yoga! Read a book! Go for a walk! Kiss a loved one!


As always, I like to end my Philosophical Fridays with a few inspiring quotes and images 🙂


BORN & RAISED IN ALASKA, WHERE I CURRENTLY RESIDE WITH MY BOYFRIEND AND SMALL YORKIE. I AM PARTIAL TO HERBAL TEA, VINYASA YOGA, AND ANYTHING WITH GINGER. BESIDES STEALING MY BOYFRIEND’S CLOTHES, I LIKE TO SHOP AT SECOND HAND STORES. I’M ALL ABOUT FINDING JOY IN THE LITTLE THINGS; LIKE MATTE PINK LIPSTICK, AND LEARNING TO LIVE WELL.


  1. Madi

    July 31st, 2018 at 1:37 am

    Love this! Change is evitable but I’m so guilty of resisting it. Thanks for the post 🙂

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